One of the two will, with justice, be champion of the Copa do Brasil next Sunday (10): either Hulk, from Atlético-MG, or Lil Gabi, from Flamengo, in a clear campaign to regain his old nickname.
Both have robust recent CVs at their respective clubs. Hulk was Brazilian and Copa do Brasil champion, won a Super Cup (against Flamengo) and even, amazingly, four Mineirinho titles. Lil Gabi is one of the last remnants of the Oscar-winning Flamengo of 2019, he won everything, scored goals in won and lost Libertadores finals (and lost a Super Cup to Atlético).
As it turns out, they both carry a lot of baggage. Maybe that’s why they are considered two of the main badasses in Brazilian football.
This humble scribe has no doubt that they must be entertaining people to some degree off the field. Hulk is always smiling, kisses little children and knows the history of the main idols of the Minas Gerais team, something rare. Lil also smiles, has a legion of fans, an invaluable collection of t-shirts for samba time… and, apparently, she knows how to rhyme. It’s not little.
But what a mess it is for 90 minutes. Have a luggage rack.
Since returning to Brazilian football, Hulk feels he has been treated unfairly by referees. In fact, some moves that would certainly be missed by less gifted attackers — like Bernard, the one with the happy legs — are not called against Hulk. It’s as if he’s guilty of being as strong or stronger than the defenders.
That said, Hulk, on the field, is a hell of a bag. He doesn’t go two minutes without complaining. Atlético’s games could be divided into time with the ball rolling, time with dead ball and time with Hulk complaining.
In addition to referees and rivals, he now argues with his own teammates. The other day he even got the good-natured Gustavo Scarpa, who is a skateboarder, but also doesn’t take offense home, out of his mind.
In Sunday’s final, at Maracanã, Hulk decided to argue with his teammate Battaglia. You shouldn’t demand attitude from an Argentine player called Battaglia, but Hulk doesn’t care about conventions. Everything resolved in the locker room, they say.
At the same Maracanã, just before the Battaglia x Hulk mess, Lil Gabi went with her own coach, Mister Filipe Luís. Lil was supposed to say a prayer (with rhyme) every night for the new coach, a former Flamengo teammate.
And he should just say “yes, sir” to any request on the edge of the field. But Lil, aka Gabigol, is proud, stuck up, really bad, and didn’t like being held accountable by his boss.
“Just talk to me?”, the trapper attacker reportedly said (trap is Lil’s musical genre, Ilustrada’s music reporter tells me). Annoyed, Professor Filipe would have called Lil a “kid”.
And Lil knows that kid (doesn’t) rhyme with goal. Made two. To the delight of all the red and black fans. And a goal, as everyone knows, is the antidote to any discussion on the field.
Next Sunday, only one suitcase will celebrate.
Round 38 – Leaky box
On the eve of Halloween, Red Bull Bragantino thought it appropriate to cut off the head of Portuguese player Pedro Caixinha. Then, he resurrected Fernando Seabra, who had died at Cruzeiro.
Thus, there were seven survivors left from round 1: Brazilians 3* x 4 Foreigners, two Portuguese and two Argentines (*counting Roger Machado).
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