You will avoid mistakes if you listen carefully before speaking and promote respectful dialogue. And empathy does not require agreement.
In moments of discussion, of conflict, tempers often flare and communication quickly becomes a set of misunderstandings and defensive attitudes.
However, one highlights two techniques Simple yet powerful ways to manage and resolve conflict by responding to the other person’s emotional needs.
The results suggest that empathic paraphrasing—actively listening to and reflecting the interlocutor’s emotions and concerns—is a highly effective way to reduce tension and create constructive dialogue.
The explains that empathic paraphrasing happens when the listener rephrases the interlocutor’s words in their own terms, while at the same time recognizing the emotions underlying those words.
By validating the other person’s feelings, even if you disagree with their perspective, the listener can significantly reduce defensiveness and negativity, paving the way for resolution.
Other studies have shown that participants who talked about recent conflicts felt more understood and less emotionally charged when interviewers paraphrased their feelings – and this demonstrates the profound impact of this technique.
Therefore, here are two essential tips to neutralize, calm, an argument.
Actively listen and reflect emotions
This is effective empathetic paraphrasing. That starts with active listening.
We put aside the desire to respond defensively or prepare a counterargument, we focus entirely on what the other person is saying, both cognitively and emotionally.
For example, if a partner expresses frustration due to poor communication, a response such as “I understand why you are frustrated; you were waiting for me to call, and I didn’t” conveys empathy and respect for the person’s feelings, instead of disregarding them.
Another supports this approach, showing that people perceive listeners as more attentive when they demonstrate understanding and respect – even if they disagree.
This technique promotes a feeling of listening, reducing defensiveness and encouraging cooperative dialogue.
Encourage clarification to avoid misunderstandings
In situations where the person’s true concerns are unclear, ask clarifying questions to further reduce misunderstandings.
For example, if a coworker feels like their work is not valued, respond with, “It sounds like you feel like you’re being ignored. Can you share more about this?” – opens a respectful and impartial space for dialogue.
By inviting the other person to elaborate, the listener avoids assumptions, deepens understanding, and helps move the conversation toward resolution rather than escalation.
This approach also involves reframing conflicts as opportunities for understanding rather than a dispute, focusing on shared goals rather than individual grievances.
For example, in domestic conflicts, by empathizing with a partner’s situation, the focus can shift from assigning blame to finding common ground, resulting in constructive outcomes.
Empathy does not require agreement; it’s about balancing respect for yourself with validating the other person’s emotions. By prioritizing empathy and openness, conflicts can go from being tense confrontations to being meaningful conversations, promoting stronger and more resilient relationships.
