When someone close to us is mourning, we should not assume that we know what this person feels. First of all, it is important not to rush with advice or attempts to “look on the positive side.”
Losing someone dear is one of the hardest experiences you can go through in life. To receive affection and support Of others can make a huge difference, so it is commendable that you want to be present for someone bereaved and think carefully in the best way to help you.
Each person lives mourning differentlywhich makes it even harder to know what to say or do. When emotions are at the flower, the simple presence, accompanied by affection and availability, may be exactly what they need most.
Several studies have shown that often It is more difficult to have empathy For others of what we judge, note a. So you do not assume that you know what the person is feeling.
First of all, look, delicately, Ask you how it is.
If you are not sure if the other person prefers to be alone or accompaniedthen present you options. Instead of sending a message of the gender “tell me what I can do,” try something like, “Can I go through later if you feel like?”
In the closest relationships, appear with An already prepared meal Or offering help in practical tasks can be highly valued, but it is always necessary to give a way out. For example, can leave the meal to the door, without enteringif you feel that the person is not ready to receive visits.
It is also important Do not rush with advice or attempts to “look at the positive side”. First of all, Offer emotional support. Truly listen to what the person says to him; Show interest in understanding what you feel and what you need at that time.
If it makes sense, it can resort to techniques associated with what psychologists designate “active listening”, Such as paraphrase to repeat What the person conveyed to him about his feelings – to realize that he was really heard.
As time goes on and it is noted that pain is no longer so intense, it can then be opportune to step to what psychologists call “cognitive counseling”.
This approach can translate into helping the bereaved person to find ways of express your pain and to recover some hope As for the future – for example, adapting routine and daily life in positive ways.
If the person initially ask to be alone, It does not depart from the principle that this will always be like this. GO SHOWING PRESENCE, DISCRETE and without judgments.
Who isolates at first can then have difficulty resuming contacts, and the fact that Being you taking the first step It can facilitate this return.
According to psychologists, it is often useful to find ways to express mourning, and one of these forms goes through the support of others. It can be, for example, to remember the person who broke together, or Plan tribute actshow to mark important dates or visit meaningful places.
When you feel the right time has come, this is another way of being present: Accompany your friend or family member in the gesture of remembering and celebrating the life of the person who has lost.
Remember: There is no “right” or “wrong” form of living mourningand each person has their own time to feel better.
However, if after more than six months the loss continues to have a very intense impact, it may be beneficial Suggest Professional Support – An option that must be addressed smoothly and sensitively.
