The Brazilian Republic is a “gathering of more or less qualified pirates”, wrote Lima Barreto. “‘Eat’ jurists, ‘eat’ philosophers, ‘eat’ doctors, ‘eat’ lawyers, ‘eat’ poets, ‘eat’ novelists, ‘eat’ engineers, ‘eat’ journalists: Brazil is a vast ‘glutton’.”
“More or less qualified pirates” combine hunger with the desire to have dinner. And with the desire to pay entry to all the cabins of social life: flying on a jet, sailing on a yacht, participating in the arranjinho festivals in colonial mutt destinations, such as Lisbon.
It was (or Barão de Itararé) who coined the principle of justice for the regime of vast overeating: “Either let morality be restored, or let us all be happy”. You’re right. If we were all busy, inequality would be resolved.
Stanislaw also created the—”Festival of Bullshit that Ravages the Country”, to subject military bestiality to mockery. In honor of Stanislaw, a few years ago the “Festival of Legal Barbarities that Plague the Country” was created, to give legal ridicule democratic recognition.
After a year of much legal barbarity, Febejapá reemerges that night to wish for a family meeting in communion with the spirit of the time. We regret that magistocrats did not receive, as at Christmas 2024, one to “cover nutritional needs”, as claimed. Judge Eduardo Appio, the greatest symbol of inverted car wash, seems to have covered hydration needs through other means. It was apparently filmed in Blumenau.
In 2025, give loved ones an explanatory-conceptual gift to be recited orally in the living room. An analytical light at the end of the tunnel of intentional and culpable mistakes of magistocratic caradurism. Mine will be this one:
“A minister who gossips and sends messages off the record violates judicial ethics. A journalist who publishes anonymous gossip about a minister under the cover of the impersonal subject ‘ministers of the STF’ violates journalistic ethics. A lawyer who invests in unseemly meetings with magistrates and claims to be a liberal professional, not a public servant, and is therefore authorized in every way to provide the right to defense, violates legal ethics in the second degree.”
Bachelor’s degree holders do not break decorum in silence. It’s not just naivety, it’s profound theoretical disorientation on the part of more or less qualified professionals. Endowed with the professorial impulse to enlighten the unwary, they “explain to confuse you”, make themselves “enlightened so that they can blind” and “blind so that they can guide”. Tom Zé must have thought about legal medallions to compose the lyrics. Medallions to whom Machado de Assis recommended simply saying: “Before laws, let us reform customs!” The phrase “enters the spirits like a sudden burst of sunlight”.
In Christmas’ secret friend, ignore conflicts of interest, spending caps, the honor of the position of relative, family collegiality, the institutionality of affection. Family needs love, not a code of ethics. Let’s all join in on the food! And let us reform customs!
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