Emotional intelligence: 7 essential steps to success in personal and professional life

Discover how self-knowledge, empathy and emotional balance can transform your relationships and improve your daily performance

Emotional intelligence directly influences decisions, behaviors and the quality of relationships Imagem: Stock Holm | Shutterstock

Increasingly present in debates about mental health, relationships and the job market, emotional intelligence is no longer an abstract concept and has become consolidated as a practical and indispensable skill. Recognizing, understanding and dealing with your own emotions, as well as understanding what others feel, directly influences decisions, behaviors and the quality of relationships.

According to Gláucia Santana, psychoanalyst, clinical hypnotherapist and specialist in emotional regulation, whose work focuses on reprogramming emotional patterns, developing emotional intelligence is a continuous process and deeply linked to internal consciousness. “It’s not something a person is born with ready-made. Emotional intelligence is built throughout life, based on the way each person learns to deal with what they feel and the experiences they live”, he explains.

Below, the expert shares 7 essential steps to develop this skill. Check it out:

1. Start with self-knowledge

The starting point, according to the expert, is the self-knowledge. Identifying emotions, recognizing triggers and noticing automatic reactions allows you to get out of impulse and act more consciously. “When a person understands why they react in a certain way, they stop being a hostage to emotion and start having more choice about how to respond,” he says.

2. Learn to name your feelings

Another fundamental aspect is learning to name feelings. Emotions such as anger, fear, frustration and sadness often appear masked in defensive behaviors or silence. “Giving a name to what you feel helps organize your internal world and reduces the feeling of emotional confusion”, highlights Gláucia Santana.

3. Practice emotional regulation

Emotional regulation also plays a central role in this process. To develop emotional intelligence It doesn’t mean avoiding difficult emotions, but going through them with more balance. “Feeling is part of it. The difference is in not acting in a destructive way, neither against yourself nor against others”, points out psychoanalyst Gláucia Santana.

Empathy increases understanding in relationships and reduces conflicts Imagem: LightField Studios | Shutterstock

4. Exercise empathy in relationships

Empathy appears as another important pillar. The ability to put yourself in someone else’s shoes increases understanding in relationships and reduces conflicts. “Empathy isn’t about agreeing with everything, it’s about recognizing the other person’s emotions without disqualifying them,” he explains.

5. Bet on assertive communication

A assertive communication completes this skill set. Expressing feelings clearly, without aggression or guilt, strengthens bonds and prevents the accumulation of hurt feelings. “Many emotional suffering arises from what was not said or was communicated in a confusing way”, observes the specialist.

Dealing with frustrations is also part of emotional maturity. Life does not always follow the expected script, and emotional intelligence helps to tolerate limits, losses and changes. “Whoever develops this skill understands that frustration is not failure, but part of growth”, says Gláucia Santana.

7. Seek professional support when necessary

Finally, seeking professional support is an important tool on this path. THE therapy offers a safe space to work through emotions, review patterns and build more conscious responses. “Taking care of emotional health is an investment that affects all areas of life”, he concludes.

In an increasingly fast-paced and demanding scenario, emotional intelligence is no longer a differentiator and has become a necessity. Recognizing emotions, learning to regulate them and transforming internal experiences into learning is an essential step towards a more balanced life and healthier relationships.

By Sarah Monteiro

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