- According to the Cleveland Clinic website, mourning for a best friend is a natural process similar to the loss of a close family member
- Honest conversation and asking open questions are the easiest way to calm down strong emotions in a sad toddler
- According to Harvard Health Publishing, enrolling your child in sports helps you quickly build new friendships at school
- Frequent abdominal pain and daily sleep problems are a clear signal to seek support from a psychologist
End of friendship at school. Why does the child experience this so much?
When your child comes back from school and says with tears in his eyes that his friendship with his best friend is over, it breaks your heart in two. For us adults, sometimes it’s just an ordinary school quarrel, but for a toddler it’s the real end of the world. Yes loss of a close relationship it causes the child great sadness and confusion, which he or she cannot cope with on his or her own.
As we read on the Cleveland Clinic website, mourning is not just about death close people, but it also appears when you lose a friendship. The child may go through various stages, from denial and pretending that nothing happened, to great anger and finally sadness. It is worth remembering that each child experiences it differently and these emotions do not have to appear in sequence.
How to support a toddler after losing a friend? Ask the right questions
When a child is suffering from the loss of a friend, it is a good idea to simply be there and talk intelligently without judgment. According to information from Johns Hopkins Medicine, it’s worth it ask open questionsthat will encourage your toddler to share his or her emotions. Instead of asking if he has any questions about the whole situation, it is better to ask him directly how he feels about it all and what he thinks will happen tomorrow at school. We may also notice a change in the child’s behavior out loud, saying, for example, that he or she has not been eating much lately and that this is not like him. For younger children, it’s great to play together and ask what their toys are feeling at a given moment, which makes it easier to release difficult emotions.
No friends in class. Ways to build a new relationship
Over time, your toddler will be ready for new acquaintances, and we can gently help him with this, starting by setting a good example at home. Harvard Health Publishing’s website advises you to: register your child for sports activities or interest groups that he really likes, because that’s where it’s easiest to find common topics to talk about. It is worth inviting other parents and their children to a casual meeting, for example baking cookies together or going to the park. During such play, it is good to keep an eye on the children, but not interfere every time, allowing them to learn to communicate in their own way. The most important thing is to talk to your child a lot every day and listen carefully to what he has to tell us about his new friends.
When does sadness for a friend last too long? These signals should be worrying
Sometimes difficult emotions after parting with a friend do not go away, and the child’s behavior begins to make everyday life at home and at school difficult. According to the US National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH), you should consider contacting a doctor if you notice the following symptoms in your child for many weeks:
- frequent stomach or headachesthat have no clear medical cause
- a sudden drop in grades and obvious problems with learning at school
- reluctance to play with other children and avoidance of peers
- sleep problems, including frequent nightmares or severe daytime sleepiness
If these situations persist for a long time, it may be a good idea to see a specialist. Sometimes a simple conversation with a psychologist helps a child sort out this difficult time and regain the joy of everyday play.
Sources:
