Parenting How to wisely help your child with lessons? Find out how to teach them independence step by step

Parenting How to wisely help your child with lessons? Find out how to teach them independence step by step
  • As the journal Frontiers in Psychology points out, constantly doing your child’s homework lowers his or her self-confidence and results in lower grades.
  • Spending only the first five minutes at the desk with the student is a proven method that helps them quickly learn independence
  • Research confirms that a child in the first years of school should not spend more than twenty minutes a day on home notebooks
  • Reporting the total number of mistakes on a piece of paper instead of pointing at them makes it much easier to help your child with lessons every day and wisely.

Why is doing your child’s homework a bad idea? We explain

Many parents sit at a desk with their toddler and, instead of just supporting them, over time they completely take over. Often, we rush to correct mistakes right away or provide ready-made solutions just to finish faster and have a free evening. However, such excessive control causes doing homework for the child it ceases to be the student’s responsibility and becomes a bothersome problem for mom or dad.

As we can read in the journal Frontiers in Psychology, such constant interference in lessons is counterproductive. Too much parental help causes children to lose self-confidence, feel less competent and, as a result, get lower test grades. The student subconsciously feels that we do not believe in his abilities, which takes away his willingness to learn and causes him to wait only for our hints with each task.

How to wisely help your child with his lessons? The first minutes method

It’s a good idea to spend only the first five minutes of learning with your child to help him get started well and calmly. It’s a good idea to start by asking what exactly the student needs to do for the day and go through the first one or two examples together. When you are sure that the toddler understands the command, it is best to get up and leave, leaving him some space to act. Instead of sitting over your child’s head, you can set a regular kitchen timer and arrange to check the results only when the device rings. Thanks to this, we naturally show that this is the child’s work and we are only there in case of any major problems.

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Learning independence at a desk. What is worth doing every day?

The transition from reading books together to full independence takes time and patience, so it’s worth introducing a few simple habits at home:

  • giving time to find the answer on their own when the student gets stuck on a difficult word or task
  • refraining from immediately correcting mistakes when reading aloud
  • reporting corrections in general terms, for example saying that there are three errors on the page, rather than pointing fingers at them
  • rewarding the child with small pleasures independent homework completed within the allotted time

This constant pattern of action teaches patience and allows the child to discover his own mistakes. When the student notices and corrects his mistake, he will remember the correct answer for much longer.

For difficult homework. When is it worth talking to the teacher?

Sometimes, despite our best intentions, the child cries over the notebook and cannot move. There is a rule of thumb that says a student should be able to solve approximately seventy percent of their homework on their own. If your child is unable to do this without constant explanation and guidance, the material is probably simply poorly matched to his or her current skills. Instead of doing these exercises for him, it will be much better to make an appointment at school and ask the teacher for tasks that will actually help the child consolidate knowledge without unnecessary stress. It is worth remembering that in the first years of school, home lessons should not take your child more than ten to twenty minutes a day.

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