Esperanza Rosales, a 50-year-old administrator, came across the documentary on Netflix ‘Jeffrey Epstein: Filthy Rich’. He became curious and began to watch it while his daughter, 13 yearsswarmed through the living room. The testimonies of the sisters that appear in the first chapter recounting the sexual abuse that they suffered at the hands of the deceased billionaire and sexual predator caught the girl’s attention. “Mom, who is this guy? Why did he do this to you?” Esperanza didn’t know how to react. She did not find adequate words to discuss with her daughter such gruesome topics as human evil, child prostitution, rape, and the infinite power of the economic and political elites. He settled the matter as best he could, changed the subject and turned off the television. Esperanza was spared an awkward conversation, but she missed a perfect opportunity to dialogue with your daughter, create a bond with her, provide you with information to prevent abuse and encourage your critical thinking.
The name of Jeffrey Epstein – a sex offender who committed suicide in a New York prison where he was awaiting trial in 2019 – is in all the media and in all conversations on the street as a result of the declassification of chilling documents analyzed in the US Congress. Together with his partner, Ghislaine Maxwellthe New York magnate took advantage of his influence to quietly weave a vast network of prostitution with which he and his acolytes repeatedly raped nearly a thousand girls and women.
The interest of minors
Many families find themselves unable to talk at home about such a matter. cloudy and they hope that the curiosity of their sons and daughters will be satisfied elsewhere. The arguments to maintain the taboo are the same as always: “She is very small”, “she will not understand it”, “it is not an appropriate topic”, “she does not know what prostitution is”, “we have to wait until she is older”, “they will explain it to her in class” and “I don’t know how to approach it”. However, not satisfying the interests of minors condemns them to lack of protection because they will turn to other, less reliable sources. For example, social networks, where misinformation and far-right slogans abound.
“A trick that doesn’t usually fail is to ask for help and make the teenager feel useful”
Author of ‘How to talk to a teenager and make him listen to you’, the professor Jordi Nomenwhich has just published ‘Against the tyranny of like’, encourages families to talk about relevant topics with their sons and daughters and with a language adapted to their age. The trick, he assures, is not to say general phrases but “use strategies” to engage in conversation. A trick that doesn’t usually fail is to ask for help and make the teenager feel useful. In the case of the sexual predator, the most appropriate question to start a conversation would be: “Hey, you who are aware of everything, what do you think of the news about Epstein? Have you talked about it with your friends or in class? Why do you think he acted like that with girls?”
“You should always go into all uncomfortable conversations with your teenager with an open spirit. Avoid being one-sided and infantilizing him because he will detect the tone of superiority and will not want to listen to you”
Los sermons are totally out of place. Especially after a certain age. “You should always go into all uncomfortable conversations with your teenager with an open spirit and a willingness to understand their ideas. Avoid being one-sided and infantilizing them because they will detect the tone of superiority and will not want to listen to you,” advises the communicator specialized in adolescence. Diana Al Azem in his book ‘I want to understand you!’.
Jeffrey Epstein, in a file image / Europa Press
emotional-sexual education
Start a chat about infamous EpsteinIn any case, it requires prior steps. Given that we are facing a very serious case of sexual abuse and power, the first commandment is to promote emotional-sexual education at home. It is not about talking about postures or orgasms but about supporting their self-esteem, instilling respect in others and, above all, preventing abuse. It is not about giving a great talk on a specific day, but about speak many times. These types of conversations cannot begin in adolescence (you are already late) but in childhood. “Your child’s sexual education should begin at age 0,” recalls psychologist Anna Salvia, author of ‘Porn is NOT cool’, a didactic manual to prevent pornography from becoming the sexual educator of boys and girls.
Buy bodies
Like a predator, Epstein and his henchmen sought out girls from disadvantaged backgrounds and dazzled them with his mansions and his endless fortune. He offered $200 to girls who were between 14 and 16 years old for a massage. That situation is perfect for talking to preteen children about two key issues: what is sexual abuse and what is consent. Also, of course, the prostitution. “Do you think that if the girls hadn’t needed the money they would have gone to his house?” and “why did Epstein think he was safe from everything?” These are questions that can give rise to talking about what it means to buy a body and the impunity in which a magnate moved for years who rubbed shoulders with judges, prosecutors, university professors, presidents of Government and members of European royalty.
“You think the girls went because they wanted to?” “He didn’t physically abuse them and he didn’t force them, right?” and “do you think that’s abuse?” They are questions to maintain a conversation and clarify concepts
“What do you think? Did the girls go because they wanted to? Do you think you can coerce someone without physically abusing them? Do you think that’s abuse?” These questions are an example to continue the conversation and clarify concepts. “The majority of abuse in childhood consists of touching and masturbation. Now, the fact that they are not actions ‘as serious’ as imagined, does not take away one bit of seriousness from the fact of the abuse and the possible effects on the minor,” recalls psychologist Mamen Jiménez in the manual ‘I will explain it to you’. The specialist highlights that the secret and the silence of victims is one of the reasons why it is so difficult to detect abuse. The Epstein case is a perfect excuse to remind your child of the importance of always counting on you. Unfortunately, one in three boys and girls who have suffered abuse will never talk about it, Jiménez recalls. When something happens to your child or gets into trouble, you should be the first person they call.
Professor Nomen insists that in those families where it is possible talk about sexcontraception, sexually transmitted diseases and contraceptive methods reduces the risk of the danger materializing. “This does not mean giving tacit permission to children to start having sex, but rather overcoming the modesty of past generations to help children take care of their health. It is somewhat intimidating, but adolescents who deal with the issue as a family, normally, are those who postpone their first sexual relations and protect themselves if they have them,” concludes the divulger.
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