It is in the voice of Shiva Amini and her experience that we try to understand how difficult it is to play sports in Iran, especially for a woman
Shiva Amini says that the lives of Iranian athletes can change in an instant.
Amini was a football player on the Iranian futsal team until 2017, when she was photographed casually playing football with some friends in Switzerland – a crime, according to the Iranian regime. She was also not wearing the mandatory hijab – another crime. She quickly realized that it would be very dangerous to return home and that nothing would be the same as before.
“I lost everything, you know, my family, my safety, my home, even my dog,” he confesses to CNN Sports. Amini still has money in an Iranian bank account that he does not have access to. “You are in a new country, with new people, a new culture, a new language and you have to start from scratch.”
This is the situation that some Iranian footballers are now facing, after requesting asylum during the Asian Cup in Australia. Seven players had initially requested asylum, but five withdrew their applications over the weekend.
Shiva Amini appears playing football in Switzerland without the hijab. It was this photo that got him into trouble with the Iranian regime, leading to his defection (Shiva Amini via CNN Newsource)
“I completely understand what they are going through because I have been in their shoes,” continues Amini.
The team’s ordeal began when they played South Korea on the Gold Coast, two days after the US and Israeli attacks on Iran. The players chose not to sing the national anthem before the match. Having been labeled traitors in Iran and after reports that some of their families had been threatened, the players sang the anthem before the other two games. When the tournament ended, some sought asylum in Australia, while the majority of the team returned home.
Regardless of the decision these players made, their future is now very uncertain. In moments like this, Amini says the regime puts athletes in front of an almost impossible choice.
“You have to think about your freedom or your family,” he explains, adding that the regime was so desperate for all the players to return that it even offered money for them to comply.
Amini says she has kept in touch with some of the players at different times during this ordeal. Some people sent messages saying they were unable to communicate because they were under the control of their companions, quickly deleting the text messages after sending them. Some admitted they “froze” as they tried to decide their future, struggling with the enormity of their decision.
“I cried when they said: ‘Yes, we want to stay’. I shouted: ‘You have to stay, please!’”, he recalls. “At the same time, I felt guilty if something happened to their family. It’s very complicated, it’s very difficult.”
Those returning don’t even know if their families are safe or alive because the government has cut off the internet in Iran.
It has been almost 10 years since Amini was forced to start a new life, first in Switzerland, then in Italy and now in New York. She has not forgotten the painful way she was suddenly forced into exile, nor the difficulties life as a female athlete faced under the regime.
Amini defected from Iran after she was caught playing football in public without her hijab (Shiva Amini via CNN Newsource)
“In one word, I can say it was humiliating,” he recalls. “They used them as a tool to cover up their crimes.”
On one occasion, he spoke to Mehdi Taj, current president of the Iran Football Federation, about a sponsorship issue, but he was more interested in something else.
“’Forget football, forget all this’”, were the man’s words. “’What’s your plan for tonight?’ The presidents of all federations belong to the regime and sport in Iran is under the total control of politicians, so every day we faced misogyny and discrimination.”
Amini became visibly emotional as she described the treatment she often had to endure.
“Every time we entered that federation, we were prepared for those dirty conversations with them. I’m shaking, I’m sorry, I’m traumatized. I really don’t want to talk about this because it makes me very angry”, she adds.
He fears for his friends and family who are still in Iran, admitting that he is often afraid to check his cell phone in the morning to check the news. The athletes who fell victim to the regime’s recent crackdown in January are kindred spirits – she mentions 15-year-old swimming champion Arnika Dabbagh, who was shot and killed during the mass protests that swept the country, and wrestler Saleh Mohammadi, who faces the death penalty, allegedly for killing a police officer. Human rights groups in Iran claim that his confession was obtained through torture.
“My biggest concern now is the athletes in prison,” continues Amini. “More than 100 are imprisoned and facing rape. They are being tortured and also executed. In a normal country, athletes are greeted with medals and prizes. In my country, athletes are greeted with bullets.”
Shiva Amini, who defected from Iran after being caught playing football without her hijab in public, displays a sign protesting the Iranian regime (Shiva Amini via CNN Newsource)
Recently, Amini spoke at the United Nations about the suffering of so many people under the regime, declaring firmly that he refuses to give in to tyranny.
“As we sit here talking,” she explains to CNN, “I don’t know if my family is alive or not. I don’t know if the regime is holding them hostage or not. I’m very worried about them, I don’t know what to do. But at the same time, I can’t be silenced. I want to be the voice of those people in Iran.”
She and other athletes have tried to get the world’s attention before, working with exiled Iranian journalist and women’s rights activist Masih Alinejad; this time, she feels like people are finally listening. He’s asking Elon Musk to help Iranians get online, and he’s asking the Australian government and US President Donald Trump to find a way to help the families of female football players reunite with their daughters abroad.
Amini knows how painful forced separation can be, as her father passed away while she was in Europe.
“My biggest dream is to return to Iran”, he guarantees, “and the first thing I want to do is get a bouquet of flowers, go to my father’s grave and talk to him”.
Amini gets emotional when talking about the last conversation they had over FaceTime, explaining that she had tried, unsuccessfully, to get him out of Iran. “I said, ‘Dad, I tried so hard.’”
“I just want to say I’m sorry. I feel so guilty. And this guilt is killing me.”
